Fathers' Day and the Hockey Trial

There was no Father’s Day for me. I grew up without a dad; I had a mother figure, not a father figure. So I am hardly an expert on men. I am not an expert on consent either, but I do have thoughts, particularly after the sexual assault trial of the Junior Hockey Canada players.

When I was in my twenties, I did not give consent, and was not asked for it. Ever. Alcohol was often involved, sometimes I was hammered, sometimes we both were, but I was sure we were both consenting. Often, it was good; if not, it was always worth trying. But I was lucky. In other situations, where I took chances, I could have been raped. I was never not in control of myself, but sometimes control is not enough. Particularly when you are cornered.

Per the stated facts of the case, after having consensual sex with E.M., Michael McLeod allegedly sent a text to his colleagues at the hotel for “a 3 way quick. 209”. About half of the players who got the invite showed up in his room. A 3-way is not what is alleged to have happened.